Friday, June 27, 2008
mY FAVORITE THING ABOUT fRIDAY IS...
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Friday, June 13, 2008
Speaking of Spandex
My Jennie just cracked me up with her Spa Day story. It includes spandex. I don't have a spa day story, but I DO have a gym day story!
I go to the local 24 Hour fitness on occasion. Quite early in the morning, I usually get there at 5:20ish. So there's this man. This man will henceforth be known as "Creepy Spandex Guy" or CSG because I'm too lazy to type all that out. Well, CSG is an odd sort of fellow. He wears head bands, which, in and of themselves are not creepy, it's just the way his long mangy hair sorta puffs out the top of it that looks a bit off. His spandex is where the REAL issue lies. It's purple. Not like purple, purple, but more of a lilac-brownish sort of purple. When the purple ones are dirty, then it's pink (dirty baby pink). When those are both dirty he opts for those really short, REALLY loose gym shorts. Oh, he tops it all off with a loose fitting tank top, the kind that hangs really low in front. So, as if the spandex wasn't bad enough....my friends and I were sure he didn't wear anything under them. It turns out he does. I had a few free sessions with a personal trainer and was telling him of CSG. He knew exactly who I was talking about. The trainer had the blessed opportunity to be in the locker room with CSG and confirmed that he does, indeed, wear undies....a thong. I am uncertain, at this point, which is more disturbing. I should mention that CSG's fave thing at the gym is the Elliptical Trainer. Hold on....
OK. Had to throw up.
So, this morning. I went to the gym, I was minding my own business swimming laps the pool room was nicely deserted. UNTIL...da da da dum. Apparently CSG found a close out on dirty lilac spandex. He walked past the pool (and into a sauna...THANK HEAVENS) in what else? A purple Spandex SPEEDO!!! I don't think I'll sleep tonight.
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
My Sambo
Sam's birthday is roday. He's be three. We're THIS CLOSE to being done with the whole terrible two's thing....not that I have ANY hope whatsoever that Sam will magically turn into a minding, well behaved little man...there would be no fun in that....it's just that I see a light at the end of the Terrible Two Tunnel (it is worth mentioning that, in Sam's case, the terrible two's started not when he was two years old, or even when he was one. No, no, no- he was a wee two days old when they started.) I think I'll share some of my favorite memories, what I was taught by them, and, in some cases, what I SHOULD have learned or done differently...
Such a sad little baby...
Let's start when he was a teeny tiny little one: My mom came out for a week when Sam was born. She was a saint and took care of him during the nights so I could get a little bit of sleep. The first night (maybe second), he. screamed. bloody. murder. until the wee hours of the night. In fact, I believe the sun was starting to creep up by the time the lad stopped. Long night for everyone in my condo building, I'm sure. What I learned: My mom is amazing. What I should have learned: Sam has his own idea of what he wants to do and when he wants to do it.
Check out the dimples. They're enough to melt you.
I MIGHT OVER SHARE HERE....SCROLL DOWN IF YOU'RE NOT INTO BREAST FEEDING HORROR STORIES!!
OK....YOU CAN READ AGAIN
It would have been so easy if he were always so stinkin' happy!
Aaron was making Lemon Bars for a treat one day. We went to the store and bought all the stuff we needed, this included a dozen eggs. We left one load of groceries on the counter and went outside for another. We came back in and Sam said, "I be helper" there were 3 or 4 eggs on the ground, and not in one piece, either! From this I learned that the words "I be helper" should always be responded to immediately.
Who knew that horns came in edible varieties....
One day we went to Cold Stone's for a treat. I don't think Sam was one yet, and if he was, he wasn't much past that. There we were, Aaron, Liv, Sam, and me sitting enjoying our ice cream. Enter 2 teen age girls, quite cute and dressed very much like it was summer time (tube top and shorts, tank top and mini). They chose the table next to us. Sam starred at them, well, mostly at their legs and chests. It was ridiculous. And quite embarrassing. Aaron laughed at him. To this day Sam has no problem charming the ladies. He smiles and shows off those dimples. Not too many women can resist his eyes and dimples. Lesson learned: In Sam's case the age when he can date will be no less than 21.
'nough said.
A few for fun:
Mr. Clean deserves some sort of reward for creating the Magic Eraser. It has saved the relationships of moms and their boys everywhere.
It doesn't matter who, or what, you are, you can still get in trouble in Sam's mind...."No sun, NO! You're in TROUBLE" when the sun shines in Sam's eyes in the car. "No, baby, NO! We be nice to books! Say 'sorry book'!"...when Emerson got a hold of his favorite book "Hymns".
One of Sam's many "artistic" moments. Weapon of choice? Clinique lipstick.
My sweet baby boy...where did he go??
I LOVE THIS BOY!!